Doesn't really matter when you don't get a choice.
Log Cabin Girl could work.
( this is not an earnest suggestion. Leon is just being catty by not providing an actual name in his first bout. and they did have a memorable time in a log cabin together!!! )
( wow, excuse me, Plenty O'Toole was drowned by thugs that didn't want the mess of a potential witness. she def did get at least a kiss from Bond before that happened!! )
Thought you'd like to know there's more to her than a dick joke before you commit to a code name.
Though if you'd like to explain why you thought going from Umbrella to developing brain control parasites for a megalomaniac was an upward career trajectory, I'm listening.
( yeah, it's ALL ASHLEY. he has no say in it. Leon has grown out of his stupid bleeding heart phase, he's not that kid that has to try and save everyone anymore. just the ones the president's daughter has formed a soft spot for. no personal investment here at ALL. )
But I'd appreciate if I don't end up with you down my sights the next time some corrupt organization decides to weaponize an prehistoric parasite.
Ashley is a nice girl, who may not know what it's like to make hard decisions in the moment. But I can assure you I don't have any specific plans to get shot, by you or anyone else.
What I meant was: you might have another option for extraction, if things go very badly. It is always worth knowing the exits, as long as you have the right key.
There's no cure for it, you know, even with modern medicine. But most people don't even think to worry. They don't have to, unless they happen to live somewhere very rural and isolated, with poor infrastructure and a bias against technology.
This place had a real problem, as anyone might expect out of 'the Valley of the Wolves.' An animal bite, and then a funeral. At the time it seemed like an obvious culprit. None of us knew any better.
( it's ... a reason. if Leon makes an attempt to look outside his rabid dog with a bone perspective, Umbrella wasn't always notorious for human atrocity. wanting to be a part of progress isn't a terrible motivator. sticking around after the human atrocities started is a bigger issue. jumping from the frying pan to the fire isn't great either. but getting turned around from who you thought you'd be and what you thought you'd do is something Leon can rather relate to.
good intentions being weaponized isn't entirely foreign to him either. it's all complicated. black and white would be easier. if only he were still a kid, looking at the world like it was a 100 piece puzzle. )
You being from around here wasn't in my dossier. ( maybe he's guessed, but little kids liking Don Quixote isn't definitive proof, now is it. )
[ leon probably knows a little bit about employers that seem great on paper and then stop taking no for an answer-- although luis 100% did not actively send his resume to some fucked up cultists, that entire thing snowballed disastrously from the moment he set foot back in the area. ]
Sometimes it's useful to come from nothing.
[ actually most of the time it's NOT but it's useful when you've got warrants out for your arrest and need to disappear off-grid ]
I'm not sure the government even considers this a-- settlement, just some people living out in the woods determined to make their lives harder.
Anyway, you know the story. Somebody grows up in a terrible small town, they leave as soon as possible, and then get dragged back just to prove that no one ever really escapes. An incredible cliche.
Oh, and the place is infinitely worse than they remember, when they do go back. Now it's run by a cult and a maniac in a castle. Now you are from the cult town.
[ it would be funny if it wasn't happening to him! a real comedy of bizarre events, highly relatable, like the premise of any hallmark movie. ]
( complete with when all is said and done, there might not be anything to come back to. Leon feels rather left-footed here, is he supposed to ... say something comforting? is there comfort to be had here? probably, though whether he's at all capable of providing it is a better question. )
Seemed like a decent enough place before Saddler happened to it. Especially if you happen to be against toilets that flush.
( well he tried, nobody said a dumb disarming joke could not be included in his rusty attempt to connect to another human )
[ well it would certainly be much worse if this had been a wonderful caring luddite utopia and luis has been shooting at all his beloved former neighbors
fortunately the only person he ever gave a shit about here died in a fire. everybody else is... already dead, even though they might still be walking around. ]
Fortunately it was not.
Sancho, please tell me you've been a little gentler about things, with the princess.
Maybe there wasn't much to lose. Doesn't mean it doesn't feel like shit there's nothing left to save.
( fine, is that better? raccoon city was a shithole, a town capsizing on itself after Umbrella severed its parasitic interest. and he still feels guilty about it, even close to a decade later. Leon isn't even from this sad little ramshackle "what a marvel to have an ironworks in 1996!!!" town and he can feel the loss of it. )
( as for Ashley... vivid flashbacks of "just give me a heads up before you stab me next time, ok" ... no, no, he's been VERY gentle with baby eagle!! but fine, perhaps he needs to be more cognizant of his audience when he tries to deflect from dread and survivors guilt. Luis isn't the bad joke type, what would distract him? )
Last time I checked, you're not a kidnapped coed. Didn't think you needed it gentle.
[ luis is sometimes the bad joke type but he's still under the impression that leon is justifiably angry at him for being such a sketchy bitch and/or privately thinks luis brought this all down on himself, which. is not not true. the double-agent thing sounded like an accusation, even if it wasn't meant that way.
also damn he just tripped over NOTHING AT ALL and dropped his phone, jesus christ.
this is probably payback for the blonde stuff earlier. leon obviously doesn't MEAN it ]
Very funny.
Well senor bad luck, at least you managed to acquire a native guide for your tour through hell.
( that is the pitfalls of only barely flirting on a blue moon. nobody ever sees it coming. or realizes its happening. which is fine because it's not like he was sincere about it anyway. he's on the job. just trying to get Luis to sober up and focus on the MISSION. nothing else!!! obv !!!!!!! )
I've had worse. ( tour guides through hell, that is. you met Krauser yet, Luis? yeah... definitely he's had worse. )
[ luis is plenty sober thank u he can flirt like his life depends on it (maybe it does?) and be a little fatalistic and shoot zombies all at the same time. he performs well under pressure etc eyebrow wriggle. look at all these spinning plates and loyalties and agendas he can balance. ]
You keep saying that, which is honestly concerning. When I suggested earlier that maybe you'd been in spots like this before, I was actually talking about the chains, not the-- everything else.
[ well at least leon hasn't told him to shut the fuck up or stopped replying entirely, although it still doesn't feel like luis has managed to improve his standing. honesty is so rarely the best policy.
if leon trusts him less, now, well. he earned that, didn't he? ]
I must have missed it. I didn't realize you were such an expert in everything double-O.
[ it's cute, actually. and literally the only personal detail he's managed to pry out of leon, aside from his anti-blonde stance. ]
Contrary to popular opinion, I've been in more active outbreak situations than I have shackles.
( Luis what does that even MEAN. he's too repressed to have much opinion of kink, hard to know if it's a compliment to seem like he's been chained to things before. )
Came out in '87. Weak villain, but not a bad first outing for Dalton.
You could be a decent Milovy.
( in over her head, still brave enough to take a stand when she figured out she had made some unfortunate bedfellows. she also survives to the end. and Luis thinks his opinion is fully sour! )
One of a few options that aren't obvious dick jokes.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
not me googling "which is the worst bond girl" so i'll recognize leon's inevitable suggestion
Date: 2023-06-07 04:19 am (UTC)My vote is for the nuclear physicist girl, who is also a supermodel and survives all the way to the end.
[ and isn't vesper the double agent ]
truly the fount OVERFLOWS with terrible bond girl code names
Date: 2023-06-07 03:29 pm (UTC)Log Cabin Girl could work.
( this is not an earnest suggestion. Leon is just being catty by not providing an actual name in his first bout. and they did have a memorable time in a log cabin together!!! )
no subject
Date: 2023-06-07 04:05 pm (UTC)[ :C an irrelevant side character huh buddy ]
HI IM ALIVE
Date: 2023-06-12 08:42 pm (UTC)( Leon ... is this ... flirting??? if so please do better )
WELCOME BACK
Date: 2023-06-13 01:15 am (UTC)So you do have eyes for more than guns, hm?
I'd be a fool to disagree with that description.
ty the last few days of my vacay kicked my ass [affectionate / derrogatory]
Date: 2023-06-13 02:00 am (UTC)( on one hand, Luis should definitely pick Leon if he ever has to win a James Bond trivia night. on the other hand, ouch, Leon, jesus!!! )
when u need a vacay from your vacay
Date: 2023-06-13 02:26 am (UTC)also leon are u literally telling him you would DROWN HIM if he makes another pass. the mood whiplash is real ]
if this is your way of hinting that we have some things left to discuss re: previous and/or previous-previous employers
well
no time like the present
fr i think im coming out of the tailspin now but that was ruff
Date: 2023-06-13 02:55 am (UTC)Thought you'd like to know there's more to her than a dick joke before you commit to a code name.
Though if you'd like to explain why you thought going from Umbrella to developing brain control parasites for a megalomaniac was an upward career trajectory, I'm listening.
/cracks knuckles time 4 making shit up
Date: 2023-06-13 03:08 am (UTC)[ or retirement, if ada leaves him hanging. ]
it is the only way my friend u have my support
Date: 2023-06-13 03:22 am (UTC)( he is being rude, but, look. this team has a rocky "this bitch worked for Umbrella" foundation! is a little bit of uncertainty that unfair?? )
no subject
Date: 2023-06-13 03:51 am (UTC)If I did, it wouldn't be in my best interest to tell you about it, hm?
Actually, I hired someone from the internet to come and rescue me, which is not going particularly well so far. I plan to leave a bad review.
no subject
Date: 2023-06-13 04:31 am (UTC)( yeah, it's ALL ASHLEY. he has no say in it. Leon has grown out of his stupid bleeding heart phase, he's not that kid that has to try and save everyone anymore. just the ones the president's daughter has formed a soft spot for. no personal investment here at ALL. )
But I'd appreciate if I don't end up with you down my sights the next time some corrupt organization decides to weaponize an prehistoric parasite.
no subject
Date: 2023-06-13 01:41 pm (UTC)What I meant was: you might have another option for extraction, if things go very badly. It is always worth knowing the exits, as long as you have the right key.
[ a pause. ]
The answer is rabies, by the way.
no subject
Date: 2023-06-14 02:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-06-14 02:50 am (UTC)There's no cure for it, you know, even with modern medicine. But most people don't even think to worry. They don't have to, unless they happen to live somewhere very rural and isolated, with poor infrastructure and a bias against technology.
This place had a real problem, as anyone might expect out of 'the Valley of the Wolves.' An animal bite, and then a funeral. At the time it seemed like an obvious culprit. None of us knew any better.
now im like icly did leon read his sad lore or was he a speedrunner mashing x
Date: 2023-06-15 02:20 pm (UTC)good intentions being weaponized isn't entirely foreign to him either. it's all complicated. black and white would be easier. if only he were still a kid, looking at the world like it was a 100 piece puzzle. )
You being from around here wasn't in my dossier. ( maybe he's guessed, but little kids liking Don Quixote isn't definitive proof, now is it. )
hm some old photographs and shit I DON'T NEED THESE /tosses
Date: 2023-06-15 03:02 pm (UTC)Sometimes it's useful to come from nothing.
[ actually most of the time it's NOT but it's useful when you've got warrants out for your arrest and need to disappear off-grid ]
I'm not sure the government even considers this a-- settlement, just some people living out in the woods determined to make their lives harder.
Anyway, you know the story. Somebody grows up in a terrible small town, they leave as soon as possible, and then get dragged back just to prove that no one ever really escapes. An incredible cliche.
Oh, and the place is infinitely worse than they remember, when they do go back. Now it's run by a cult and a maniac in a castle. Now you are from the cult town.
[ it would be funny if it wasn't happening to him! a real comedy of bizarre events, highly relatable, like the premise of any hallmark movie. ]
unless it sells for 30k to the merchant he's not interested
Date: 2023-06-18 06:22 pm (UTC)( complete with when all is said and done, there might not be anything to come back to. Leon feels rather left-footed here, is he supposed to ... say something comforting? is there comfort to be had here? probably, though whether he's at all capable of providing it is a better question. )
Seemed like a decent enough place before Saddler happened to it.
Especially if you happen to be against toilets that flush.
( well he tried, nobody said a dumb disarming joke could not be included in his rusty attempt to connect to another human )
leon you are so bad at this
Date: 2023-06-18 06:46 pm (UTC)fortunately the only person he ever gave a shit about here died in a fire. everybody else is... already dead, even though they might still be walking around. ]
Fortunately it was not.
Sancho, please tell me you've been a little gentler about things, with the princess.
1/2
Date: 2023-06-18 07:09 pm (UTC)( fine, is that better? raccoon city was a shithole, a town capsizing on itself after Umbrella severed its parasitic interest. and he still feels guilty about it, even close to a decade later. Leon isn't even from this sad little ramshackle "what a marvel to have an ironworks in 1996!!!" town and he can feel the loss of it. )
no subject
Date: 2023-06-18 07:18 pm (UTC)Last time I checked, you're not a kidnapped coed. Didn't think you needed it gentle.
( if this doesn't work really WHAT will )
no subject
Date: 2023-06-18 08:01 pm (UTC)also damn he just tripped over NOTHING AT ALL and dropped his phone, jesus christ.
this is probably payback for the blonde stuff earlier. leon obviously doesn't MEAN it ]
Very funny.
Well senor bad luck, at least you managed to acquire a native guide for your tour through hell.
no subject
Date: 2023-06-27 12:17 am (UTC)I've had worse. ( tour guides through hell, that is. you met Krauser yet, Luis? yeah... definitely he's had worse. )
The Living Daylights. You see that one?
no subject
Date: 2023-06-28 09:31 pm (UTC)You keep saying that, which is honestly concerning. When I suggested earlier that maybe you'd been in spots like this before, I was actually talking about the chains, not the-- everything else.
[ well at least leon hasn't told him to shut the fuck up or stopped replying entirely, although it still doesn't feel like luis has managed to improve his standing. honesty is so rarely the best policy.
if leon trusts him less, now, well. he earned that, didn't he? ]
I must have missed it. I didn't realize you were such an expert in everything double-O.
[ it's cute, actually. and literally the only personal detail he's managed to pry out of leon, aside from his anti-blonde stance. ]
no subject
Date: 2023-06-28 10:17 pm (UTC)( Luis what does that even MEAN. he's too repressed to have much opinion of kink, hard to know if it's a compliment to seem like he's been chained to things before. )
Came out in '87. Weak villain, but not a bad first outing for Dalton.
You could be a decent Milovy.
( in over her head, still brave enough to take a stand when she figured out she had made some unfortunate bedfellows. she also survives to the end. and Luis thinks his opinion is fully sour! )
One of a few options that aren't obvious dick jokes.